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Friday, August 22, 2008

What..... in the heck.... is this?

If you know me at all, you know I have an aversion to creepy, crawly things. Ok, 'aversion' may be too light of a word--I'm horrified. I will admit to having a frog-phobia, as well as panic attacks if anything 'buggy' comes near me. I don't know when I became this way. I was raised on a farm. I vividly remember being excited about smashing potato bugs (don't know their real name) between two rocks with Grandma in the garden. I used to collect the little black chicken house bugs (don't know their real name) until Grandpa would tell me to stop. I would dig up worms and chase down grasshoppers for fish bait and had no problem sliding a hook into their little bodies. (I'm near fainting just thinking about it.) And if by chance, the fish swallowed the hook, I wouldn't hesitate slicing the poor thing open to get my hook out. (Ah! The horror.) So, what happened to me? When did I morph into this ultra-squeamish, anti-creepy crawly GIRL who makes my five year old kill spiders and chase away frogs because I simply cannot do it? It's sad. Very sad.

Ok, so there's a little background for you. Now, let me tell you about the event that occurred this morning. I casually walked into my kitchen, completely unaware that I was being watched. I cleaned off my counter then unassumingly looked up to the ceiling, and there it was... a hideous creature with 498 legs just hanging there... waiting to make his move and drag me back to his lair. Brace yourselves.



AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! What in the heck is that thing? What did I do, you may ask. Seriously... you have to ask? I contemplated dialing 9-1-1. It IS the emergency number. But then decided to call Matt. He came home and couldn't believe how scary this thing looked. It tried to grab him, but Matt's cat-like reflexes gave him the advantage. (He IS the Shiloh golf coach, remember?) The battle was fierce, but Matt prevailed. Way to go, Husband. All is peaceful once again. Here's a picture of 'Stella after the killing was over. I think she's been traumatized. (She's frozen this way, by the way... eyes glazed over. It's very sad.)

9 comments:

The Jordon Family said...

Ok, we have had some extremely weird creatures in this woodsy neighborhood, but I don't think we've seen that one yet.. SCARY !
I would have called my man too to come home and get it... Mica has had to come home and rescue me and sis from a lizard in my bedroom before, of all places.... they are all over the place outside .. and I don't like them!!! They look like snakes to me.. UGH ! I'm glad your friend is now gone..
By the way, I Luv Dru's jammies :)oh, and I hope she unfreezes soon..

Sara said...

Oh gross...that is creepy and scary. yuck!

Susan Pruitt said...

What? My brave friend is afraid of bugs? Not the "brave" friend that she and I were going to stay all alone at my house that one night. Remember? How brave we were! Thanks to grandma for turning on the electric blanket :)

Ben and Kristen said...

We have those same things! I tried to describe them to my pest control guy and he told me that he wanted me to save him one in a ziploc bag. What?

Superchikk said...

That is hilarious. I have to do the bug killin' at our house. And it has increased significantly since Miss Criket went back to Texas. Apparently she was a little bug killing machine and I didn't even know it.

Chris said...

OK Angela Burris Slaughter, this is a new one on me. I just ask my mate and he says he has no clue! This is bad, we live on a farm and have never seen a creature like this. I will have to ask our Father when we get to Heaven the name for this one and what purpose it seves. I have killed "2" barn spiders in 24 hours that have some how crawed into my home. If you do not remember what a barn spider looks like, open your hand and it will cover your width and length easy. HUGE! My heart rate was at peak chasing after them to take them out! Oh, yes, I was carrying my shoe wirh me for protection. LOL

Sherrilleta said...

Finger to chin. Dr. Seth (he who could tell you where the pigmies orignated) says it's a type of centipede. I think definitely steriod-induced.

April said...

I am hyperventilating just looking at that thing. Spiders freak me out, and they only have 8 legs. I think I would have had a full blown panic attack. Thank the Lord for Golf Coach Heroes. I was laughing out loud hysterical at your story. . .

Elizabeth said...

That is so much worse than the frog in my kitchen! I would be crying for sure if I found that thing in my house:)