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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Invisible Voice

I just read a blog post from Steven Curtis Chapman’s manager titled, Ever Heard An Invisible Voice? (Click here to read.) And my answer to that is “Yes.” I have. Thing is, I have shared it with very very few people because I knew that no one would believe me. I mean, why in the world with all the incredible people out there, would God choose to talk to me? I have absolutely no idea, but I believe fully, 100% that He did, and if SCC’s manager can tell his story, so can I.

It was a critical, critical turning point in my life. I was at a crossroads, determined to make things right again with God. I was still His, but my decisions didn’t reflect my Christianity in the least. It was by far one of the most difficult times in my life, and I was praying night and day for help, for a touch from Him to get me through. I had been having these horrible nightmares—the same one night after night. It was spiritual warfare at its best, almost straight from This Present Darkness, and I was scared to death, but still determined I was going to get life right one way or another.

I was lying in bed in my duplex I shared with my good friend, Lori. She had been asleep for quite a while, and I was just lying in the dark praying when I heard someone say my name. “Angela.” It sounded like a male voice, but there were no males in my apartment. So I just sort of blew it off as though I was hearing things and kept praying. Then a few seconds later, I heard it again. “Angela.” This time, I sat straight up and said, “Lori?” She of course didn’t answer. Again. "Angela." This time, I said aloud, "Yes?" Then the voice said, word for word, “We’re working on something for you.” I lay back down, totally unafraid, smiling and feeling this indescribable feeling that everything was going to be ok. And it was…. A few months later, I met Matt, and the entire course of my life was changed. A true miracle.

Call me crazy. That’s ok. I just figured if SCC’s manager could put himself out there, so could I. I’m not ashamed. And by the way, if you've never read This Present Darkness, go out today and buy it. It will make you think twice about how not alone we really are.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Here's the deal...

Ok, here's the deal. I shared in my very first blog entry back in January that I'm working on my first novel. All my life (well, at least since 2nd grade when I wrote my first story about an earthworm named Egbert--ingenious, right?) I have wanted to be a writer. I've done some freelance writing and editing here and there for pay (mostly pro bono), but for the most part, I don't enjoy it... especially the editing. Some people may wish they were better with the English language, but it can be a curse when you can't keep from editing the church bulletin every Sunday or billboards or random signs. Which reminds me..... last week at cheer camp I had to walk past a sign every day that said, and I quote, "NO STANDING OR SETTING ON STAIRS." Setting what, exactly? Drinks? Bags? Oh, did you mean SITTING? Well, then, that would be with an "i", not an "e". See? It's a curse!!! Anyway... I really wanted to finish my novel before Jeb was born, but with all the "issues" I had, especially at the end of my pregnancy, it just didn't happen. Then afterwards with the postpartum party, it didn't happen then either. And now, all I can think about is finishing.

There are three reasons that I can come up with why "finishing" hasn't happened. 1) 3 kids, not conducive to productivity 2) pure, unadulterated laziness accompanied by procrastination and 3) absolute fear of criticism. And I am fully aware that each and every listed reason, as truthful as it may be, is a pathetic, weak excuse. When God says, "Do this for me," you just do it. No excuses. Matt talked today in connection group about Moses and how he was terrified of his calling, but... he answered it, and the effect upon others was immeasurable. So, tonight I decided to give it up and answer my call head on. No more procrastinating or giving excuses. I'm in. I'm writing.

So, back to "here's the deal..." I've decided that every Sunday night, I'm going to post a small portion of the chapter I'm working on on the blog. I think by doing that, it does two things: 1) gives me a personal deadline and 2) gets me over the fear of other eyes reading my work. I can't even begin to explain how utterly terrifying that is to me. But you know, if I ever get published there is the possibility that someone else will have to read it first. So, I'll practice getting used to that here. It won't be a big portion of the novel, but a little.

So, tonight I decided to post a small excerpt of Chapter 1 and Chapter 9 (the last one I've completed). I'm cringing even as I write this, but no backing out. I'm not really looking for comments, although they are always fun to read. More than anything I ask for your prayers... prayers for my diligence and perseverance. Prayers for the cooperation of my kiddos. Prayers, prayers, prayers, and I thank you in advance. Ok, here goes nothing.

CHAPTER 1 EXCERPT

Kate stood still in the darkness of the kitchen. Her limbs no longer shaking. Her head no longer spinning. The queasiness gone from her stomach. Thoughts of Gray and the blond in her bed disappeared into the swirl of nothingness that slowly engulfed her body. She could feel the black void spinning around her like a vacuum, violently erasing her from when she stood, engulfing her heart and spirit, sucking away everything that was Kate Canton until there was nothing. Unaware, she slowly slid down the kitchen wall and ended up on the cold tile floor below. She no longer existed.

CHAPTER 9 EXCERPT

"...God was not taking care of them! God let them suffer! All the works of His hand are not good, and I will not lie for Him a day longer! So whether or not you find me to be a paradox, Kate Canton, is no concern of mine, but let me assure I am no one’s hero.” With that, he turned to leave, certain she would have nothing more to say. Kate watched him a moment and took a deep, shaky breath.

“Oh yes you are.” She finally spoke, soft and slow. Malcolm stopped and turned back to her. “You were a hero to my mother. You’re a hero to Ms. Beulah and Beulah Two. And you’re a hero to every person who comes to that church Sunday after Sunday and sits there waiting for you to stand up and say something.”


And since this is me we're talking about, and we all know I'm morally opposed to ending a post without including a picture...

I turned 33 on Saturday and celebrated by having a garage sale. Woo hoo. Last week, though, I celebrated with Matt's family, and this was my cake. (I'm slightly obsessed with flamingos. Probably because they're pink.)

Friday, June 6, 2008

Sometimes life's not fair..

Yes, that's David Cook smiling for the camera with my insanely lucky sister-in-law, Sarah! Scream! Why am I screaming? Because it's not me!!! She and some friends were eating last night at Powerhouse in Fayetteville when he came in with a few of his managers. I think they're in for the Wal-Mart shareholders meeting. Jealously overwhelms me! I am such a huge American Idol fan, and David Cook is one of my favorites. Sarah said he was extremely nice and sweet and incredibly gracious to everyone he talked to. Sigh. Oh to have been at Powerhouse...

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Lady Bug

The girls and I had fun outside today with a ladybug while Jeb slept. Just had to post this picture of 'Stella.

Cheer Camp

The girls finished cheer camp yesterday in Springdale, and it was the cutest thing ever. I may have a video to post later of their routine to a Miley Cyrus song. (Gotta love Hannah Montana.) Anyway, they enjoyed it so much and did a great job.



Amanda and Abbie did such a great job with the girls, and Belle and Dru adore them. If you have a second click here to watch their video on GAC and vote for them. Great job, Guys!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Funny Baby Belle Video

Just found this video today of Belle. Don't know why it was so funny to me, but it was. Thought I'd post it. Apparently we had WAY too much time on our hands. Enjoy.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Happy Anniversary to Us!


Today, Matt and I have been married for 7 years. Three kids later, we are still crazy about each other... most of the time, anyway. I woke up this morning to find this on the kitchen counter...
I had to get a close up of the note. Only if you've seen Napoleon Dynamite can you truly appreciate it. (He is not nearly as funny as he thinks he is. Although it did make me laugh this morning.)

I love you, Matt! Happy Anniversary.